Thursday, July 23, 2009

Are You A Good Listener?

When you tell someone something, what to you, is the perfect listening person. If you could say exactly the kind of person you would want to tell your account to, what would they be like? It doesn't matter if you are struggling with something, or you have exciting news, or you just want to share your heart. I would want someone who listened first of all. What I mean by that, is they do not interrupt to put in their thoughts or start asking questions. They listen until you are done. I would want them to be someone who knows me and understands my heart. Then I would like them to then ask questions to better understand or to give some sort of feedback as to what I said, so that I know they really heard me. Is this what you would want, or am I a weirdo out here by myself? It can be so frustrating to try and tell someone something when they constantly interrupt. Then instead of really hearing you, they can't wait to tell you how it happened to them and it was worse or better, or what it reminds them of, etc. Or do you ever start to tell someone something and you first ask how they are doing and off they go. An hour later, you have heard every detail of their life, but you never got to share what you wanted to. Listening is a dying art. I heard someone say once that we should listen twice as much as we talk. That is why God gave us 2 ears and only one mouth. :) Again, when I think on these sorts of things, then my thoughts go to.... What do "I" do when someone has something to tell me. Do I listen? Do I interrupt? Do I acknowledge what they said? Do I try to understand their heart... are they just wanting to get something off their heart, or are they just wanting someone to listen, or do they want me to share with them?

I was reading in Proverbs today. Oh, God's Word has so much to say about our words, our tongues, listening, etc. Here are a few I ran across today.

Prov 17:27 He that hath knowledge spareth his words: and a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit. In the NLT the first part of this verse reads, "Prov 17:27 A truly wise person uses few words;"

Many times we think just the opposite. We should hear more from the wise. Yet it says that a TRULY wise person uses few words. Think about that. When they speak it will be a jewel, because they don't waste words.


Prov 18:2 A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself. Again, in the NLT it says, "Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions."

Ouch! How many times do we want to be sure that everyone knows what we think. From the verse above, the wise are not worried about that.


Prov 18:13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.

We are so quick to spout our wisdom, that we often give advice before we even hear the facts. How sad is that. What does that say? "I" am more important than the other person.


Prov 10:19 In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.

Again, if I am wise my words will be few.

I want to be a good listener. I want to be a woman of few words. I am praying and asking God to help me with this. Any thoughts?

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